I should spend more time showering...

I'll try this...

1) Who was the last person you gave up on?
Sort of my mom. I don't really give up on people, but she's about as close as I come. Because it's safer for me.

2) Have you talked to a complete asshole today?
No she talked to me. I've learned not to really address my supervisor directly.

3) Are you comfortable answering all these personal questions?
That's a stupid question, no?

4) Do you think relationships are even worth it?
Of course. Again, stupid question.

5) If you could pack up and move, would you?
That depends. Do I have a mover? I'm not moving again unless I have a mover. Our bedroom furniture is heavier than !uck.

6) Do your parents really know you?
I think my dad does. Sort of. My mom thinks I'm a judgmental, close-minded, know-it-all, elitist. So...?

7) When was the last time you laughed really hard?
The other day when I turned the shower on while our new cat was in the tub. He freaked out, but couldn't get out because he's too small. It was great. I think I'm going to be a great father.

8) What are you wearing right now?
My smelly workout clothes. I should spend more time showering than answering these stupid things.

9) What are you excited for?
Monday when I start receiving students. I'm a teacher. I should be teaching.

10) Has anyone told you lately that they would always be there for you?
No, but I know at least two people that will always be there for me. And that feels pretty good. It's good that it's a select few because I really don't like people.

11) What do you want right now?
Meat. I've been craving meat lately. I don't really eat meat. But I really want a taco from Taco Bell. And I just saw a commercial for Chicken McNuggets and I almost got in my car and drove down the street.

12) Are your parents divorced?
Thankfully, yes.

13) What were you doing at 8 this morning?
Giving high-fives in the hallway to kids coming off the bus and headed to the cafeteria for breakfast. I was also telling them to, "Stay on the line." But really I don't care if they walk the line. I'm just expected to say that.

14) Do you fall for people easily?
I haven't fallen for anyone since my wife.

15) What is one word that you overuse?
"Um." Even though that's not a word. I like the word ramification, and I probably use that too much.

16) Who was the last person to text you?
My neighbor. It was about the gym. It's always about the gym. Or drinking beer. I wish it would have been about drinking beer. That's more fun than the gym.

17) What’s your mood?
I'm feeling insecure right now and horny, which isn't a good combination... especially when my wife is out of town.

18) If you took a drug test, would you pass it?
Um no. It was my birthday. I was reclaiming my youth... something I haven't done since before I was married.

19) Did you enjoy your weekend?
I watched a lot of movies, took a lot of naps, and watched SNL with some friends. Yup. I enjoyed it.

20) Do you regret doing something today?
I sort of wish I would have told my supervisor to shove her lesson plan up her ass. She handed it to me and then told me to teach it to the staff... all before I had the chance to read it. Then she tore me apart in front of everyone. You know, because I wasn't prepared.

21) Are you slowly drifting away from someone?
Sometimes myself... though I am also experiencing inner clarity. Odd?

22) Last person you told a secret to?
Ha. My pal Kris. She knows almost all my secrets.

23) What’s irritating you right now?
The fact I'm sitting here when I should be cleaning because my wife is coming home tomorrow. And I always like to come home to a really clean house. So, I want the house to be really clean for her. But I'm lazy.

24) Would you ever forgive someone if they cheated on you?
I would try like hell, but it would change everything.

25) Tell me what one of your friends is doing.
One of my friends is probably thinking about sex. It's human nature. Someone I know is thinking about sex. I hope someone I know is having sex. I hope it's good sex, too. Hot and steamy and uninhibited.

26) Are you stubborn?
It depends. Mostly, no.

27) What are you looking forward to?
Didn't I answer this? It seems like I've answered this?

28) Is there anybody you wish you could be with right now?
The Wife. I know... sappy.

29) Are you gonna be home alone tonight?
I've got Jesus in my heart. I'm never alone, right? Plus I have two cats. And monsters in my dreams.

30) Who gave you your last compliment?
Kris. She said I looked really skinny and wanted to know how much weight I've lost because I didn't look so skinny last week when I saw her last.

31) What is one thing you wish you had?
A six-pack of abs. I know that's superficial, but I don't really feel like thinking about something I really wish I had. I'd say a house, but that would come with a mortgage.

33) Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?
Uh I'm married. 7 years. No.

Which way did both #32 and #34 go?
Maybe up my supervisor's ass... with her lesson plan.

35) Do you still talk to the person you fell hardest for?
Almost every day.

36) Last movie you saw in theaters, with whom?
Kris. It was yesterday. And I can't remember the title. How sad.

37) Would you rather go to Tokyo or Paris?
Tokyo. I'd be huge in Japan. And there is probably something to be said about knowing your penis is bigger than 99.9% of all the guys around you. You know, total confidence builder.

38) What are you allergic to?
Folding laundry and cleaning out the litter box.

39) Has anyone ever complimented your eyes?
Lots of times. I think they could be more blue, bigger.

40) Are you listening to music right now?
No, I'm watching the new 90210. It's pretty funny.

41) Who else is in the room with you?
Jesus in my heart and my two cats. We're going to party later.

42) In winter, would you rather wear jackets or hoodies?
I'm a gangster, so a hoodie, I suppose. Dawg!

43) Do you wish you were somewhere else right now?
No. I'm good. Bed?

44) How long can you go without your mobile phone?
I forget it everywhere, so I'd be alright for awhile. At least until I locked my keys in my car and needed a locksmith.

45) What are you doing tomorrow?
Sorting through that damn lesson plan, finishing up some more paperwork and sitting through another meeting.

46) Ever kissed someone else’s boy/girlfriend?
Yes. Then I married her.

47) Where did you last sleep other than your room?
On my neighbors couch. I was so drunk I couldn't walk across the hall to my own bed. I'm 30. not 21. I must remember that the next time I go out with the guys.

48) What’s the worst way to say “I love you”?
While burping?

49) Who was the last person in your room besides family?
Two Filipino girls. We were walking from the porch to my living room to play Nintendo. The White guy just walked across the hall.

50) What is one place you would love to visit?
I'd like to visit my nephew. Not really a place, but that's that.